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The problem with any unwritten law is that you don't know where to go
to erase it.
		-- Glaser and Way

Marriage. a community consisting of a master, a mistress, and two slaves, making in all, two.
– Ambrose Bierce

All are lunatics, but he who can analyze his delusion is called a philosopher. — Ambrose Bierce

Don’t worry about the world coming to an end today. It’s already
tomorrow in Australia.
– Charles Schultz

A great many people think they are thinking when they are merely rearranging their prejudices. — William James

Slang is language that takes off its coat, spits on its hands, and goes
to work.

I gave up on new poetry myself thirty years ago, when most of it began
to read like coded messages passing between lonely aliens on a hostile
world.
– Russell Baker

Everyone can be taught to sculpt: Michelangelo would have had to be
taught how not to. So it is with the great programmers.

Give me a Plumber’s friend the size of the Pittsburgh dome, and a place
to stand, and I will drain the world.

Q: How many DEC repairman does it take to fix a flat?
A: Five; four to hold the car up and one to swap tires.

Q: How long does it take?
A: It’s indeterminate. It will depend upon how many flats they’ve
brought with them.

Q: What happens if you’ve got TWO flats?
A: They replace your generator.