Call of Cthulhu, 2/1

“I have it listed as ‘Nyarthotep and friends.'”

“Yeah, these are written in fish. And these are written in Cheryl.”

“Well, I would be skeptical if you said you had a genius plan.”

“We did a lot of strategic retreating.”
“We were strategically retreating while I was awake.”
“We did more.”

“How big a cable is it?”
“About eight inches.”
“Darryl, let’s unplug it!”
“Yeah, no, I’ve learned that lesson.”

“Monkey hatchets.”
“No, no, those are made of…”
“Monkeys?”
“Monkeys conduct electricity.”

“I’ve got a 38% of self-loathing. How’s that?”

“Oh, that was even worse. Glad I brought my own dice.”
“They’re just mad because you’ve been cheating on your dice with some other dice.”

“That’s fine. You don’t have to do any of these things. They’re just suggestions.”
“But you’re gonna die.”

“If your war boomerang couldn’t survive being at ground zero for a massive electrical explosion…”

“Strength? Brawl? Credit rating?”

“I plan on bringing you all back here.”
“Good. Because I need some dynamite.”

“You know what you should do? Use the gasoline to make a trail…”

“You’ve found Nyarlathotep’s beer fridge.”
“His Nyarlatho-tap?”

“Yeah, but I have a pistol and I’m getting you out of the fridge.”

“People don’t go some-when-else!”
“Well… I can see why you would think that.”

“Well, H. G. Wells’ ‘Time Machine’ would be – ”
“Poppycock.”

“I won’t tell your wife I tried to throw your ring away unless you get divorced.”

“I wanna hear this anecdote.”
“You’re not here!”
“I know!”

“Don’t go in the box.”
“I didn’t mean to! I was just trying to pour Stanley out of the box.”

“Where did you go? Because clearly you went somewhen.”

“That doesn’t sound like any when I’ve ever heard. People with animal heads?”

“Did you go anywhere when you were there? Or did you stay in the box?”

“Let’s stop talking in hocus-pocus and start talking in real words.”
“Says the man that just told me that a man fell into a painting!”

“Painting gobbledegook, spirit gobbledegook…”

“One cannot walk backwards up the stream.”
“Salmon, sir. Salmon.”

“When T-Rex got horny and fucked himself a rat…”

“Well, they didn’t eat me.”
“That remains to be determined.”

“You could be a doppelganger.”
“Is that like a platypus?”

“It’s like a light battle boomerang.”
“Like an argument boomerang.”
“Like a light disagreement boomerang.”

“I thought you were 37.”
“That’s what it says on my character sheet.”
“Then I was right all along, then.”

“I was thinking more ‘lay dynamite adjacent to it and then walk away.'”

“Well, I appreciate that, but if you put a hole in the universe, how far away can you get?”

“A portal to another place and time, that I can get behind. But a universe inside a box?”

“If it’s possible that the universe is inside the box, let’s not blow it up.”

“Can you track yourself, since it’s only been twelve minutes?”

“And it doesn’t believe it was a captive.”
“Until you blow its brains out.”
“Whoa. You’re not allowed at the zoo…”

“With all the crazy people.”
“And us.”
“No, he said that the first time.”

“I know what a metaphor is, and metaphors don’t crush trucks.”

“That’s so cute. He thinks that’s how physics works.”

“Oh, okay, so we’re all wrong.”
“He’s a local cultist asshole, not an international cultist asshole.”

“Wood burns.”
“Dynamite starts fires.”

“We haven’t burned anything down on this continent.”
“She says, staring at the one wooden building…”

“I already had dynamite; I don’t need more.”
“Who are you and what have you done with Alice?”

“On a scale of human to skeleton…?”
“Forty-five.”

“Didn’t come back from the other end of the universe just to die going through the door first.”

Category(s): Call of Cthulhu 7th Edition
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