“Hey, Tezcatlipoca! I haven’t seen you widdle on anything since you saw Cortez and decided you wanted him!”<\/p>\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n
“Are you ready for your date?”
\n“No, Optix is horribly unprepared.”
\n“We don’t care about your character.”<\/p>\n\n\n\n
“What is your problem?”
\n“He can’t get insurance because he’s not a person.”<\/p>\n\n\n\n
“You can do computer stuff, right? Can you get insurance? Can you falsify me some better insurance? I need a lower deductible.”<\/p>\n\n\n\n
“Do you need it for the date?”
\n“Yes.”
\n“You need to think about a better car than my beat-up Chevy Malibu, but yes, you can borrow it.”<\/p>\n\n\n\n
“You know, if you’re charming enough, she won’t care about what kind of car you have.
\n“You need a better car.”<\/p>\n\n\n\n
“I’ve generated new subroutines. I’ve been calculating worst case scenarios for tonight.”
\n“So you’ve created anxiety.”<\/p>\n\n\n\n
“So have you calculated the possibility that she might encounter someone at the show that she might like more than you?”
\n“Yes. It is 83%.”<\/p>\n\n\n\n
“It totally doesn’t matter. At this point, he’s going to show up at her door as a bag of marbles.”
\n“Is this under the guise of ‘be yourself’?”<\/p>\n\n\n\n
“Usually, I do not have a penis\u2026 However – “
\n“That was a really long pause there.”<\/p>\n\n\n\n
“You lose no karma for calling Jason a mother-effer.”<\/p>\n\n\n\n
“You know, Bryan. If I were a cruel person, I would suggest that he needs to download a new subroutine for a different voice, and that what it is should be according to the GM’s roll.”<\/p>\n\n\n\n
“On my planet, we execute the blue ones.”<\/p>\n\n\n\n
“Pick an appropriate stat, roll horribly, and butcher your date.”<\/p>\n\n\n\n
“I have 69 karma left.”
\n“That seems auspicious for your date.”<\/p>\n\n\n\n
“Is that actually one of your characters, or is that a supervillain?”
\n“Yes.”<\/p>\n\n\n\n
“But he comes back angrier.”
\n“That’s future-XAIR’s problem!”<\/p>\n\n\n\n
“He’s not going to be the sorcerer supreme – he’s going to be the sorcerer deluxe, which is like the supreme, but with cheese instead of sour cream.”<\/p>\n\n\n\n
“See, you’re going to be a sorcerer\u2026 adequate. A sorcerer totally average.”<\/p>\n\n\n\n
“The important thing to remember about his character is that he’s Greeen Lantern if he was a sentient power ring.”<\/p>\n\n\n\n
“So yes, we will save this club with your car.”
\n“As one really big brick.”<\/p>\n\n\n\n
“This is super<\/em> not my fault.” “I’m going back to my couch – ok, to somebody’s couch.”<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" “Hey, Tezcatlipoca! I haven’t seen you widdle on anything since you saw Cortez and decided you wanted…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[33],"tags":[32],"class_list":["post-1102","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-marvel-superheroes-rpg","tag-sons-of-asgard","wpcat-33-id"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/blog.emeraldsilver.com\/gamequotes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1102","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/blog.emeraldsilver.com\/gamequotes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/blog.emeraldsilver.com\/gamequotes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/blog.emeraldsilver.com\/gamequotes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/blog.emeraldsilver.com\/gamequotes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1102"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/blog.emeraldsilver.com\/gamequotes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1102\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1103,"href":"https:\/\/blog.emeraldsilver.com\/gamequotes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1102\/revisions\/1103"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/blog.emeraldsilver.com\/gamequotes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1102"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/blog.emeraldsilver.com\/gamequotes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1102"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/blog.emeraldsilver.com\/gamequotes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1102"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}
\n“This is entirely your fault. Every last bit of it.”<\/p>\n\n\n\n