“You know, I would give him Vulnerability: Backhoe. I would allow that.”<\/p>\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n
“But it’s a vehicle, so it goes at the end of the round. I just made that rule up – sentient vehicles always go at the end.”<\/p>\n\n\n\n
“It’s 80s power ballads – ukulele version.”<\/p>\n\n\n\n
“I won’t give you any penalties.”
“\u202612.”
“Yeah, I didn’t need to give you any penalties.”<\/p>\n\n\n\n
“Theoretically, there’s some sauce in the gas tank.”
“And also in the bottle I’m carrying.”
“But the gas tank is funnier.”<\/p>\n\n\n\n
“It’s nice that y’all get stunts, but I get stunts too.”
“I don’t think that’s the case. Unfair.”<\/p>\n\n\n\n
“I run up to it and say, ‘There’s a lot of dust here, and they say that dust is dead skin, so I think that everyone else on this world is dead. And they also say some of it is pet dander, which I think is why you keep sending inside-out dogs at us,’ and I’m using Misdirection\u2026”<\/p>\n\n\n\n
“Oh awesome! Does a 3 hit?”
“That would be\u2026 defense, sir?”
“It would.”
“That does not hit.”<\/p>\n\n\n\n
“That’s six points of hit and eight points of holy water.”
“At least that’s working.”<\/p>\n\n\n\n
“Six points, grind death.”
“It ground my death off? I’m immortal!”<\/p>\n\n\n\n
“Rebel, does an 11 hit you?”
“No.”
“Actually, it would be a 10 – does a 10 hit you?”
“No!”<\/p>\n\n\n\n
“It’s good, until it’s not – and I has fix for that too.”
“Has fix?”
“I can haz fix you!”<\/p>\n\n\n\n
“It’s enough to agitate the water molecules. It’s humid now.”<\/p>\n\n\n\n
“He doesn’t look as\u2026 well-assembled\u2026 as he used to be.”<\/p>\n\n\n\n
“I think you should do that more often – you should make up for our good rolls by rolling badly.”<\/p>\n\n\n\n
“There are explosions, and it kind of stumbles back from your singing.”
“You know, that’s not uncommon.”<\/p>\n\n\n\n
“I stand up, wipe my nose, and say, ‘Hey, dick-fist, we’re not done yet.'”
“I hope you have something good to back that up with\u2026”<\/p>\n\n\n\n
“Tie goes to the home dimension! Damn it!”<\/p>\n\n\n\n
“Defense is a target number – it’s not a tie!”<\/p>\n\n\n\n
“If nobody had started playing music, I was going to thumb-drive the Monster\u2026 to play hiphop.”<\/p>\n\n\n\n
“I call a taxi, because I have my phone and Noah has his wallet.”<\/p>\n\n\n\n
“Actually, before I call the taxi, we should probably walk a distance away from\u2026”
“The blast radius?”
“The criminality zone.”<\/p>\n\n\n\n
“That went about as I anticipated, which makes me very happy.”
“Darryl unconscious for half the fight?”<\/p>\n\n\n\n
“No, this one you will have to make the decision not to know what’s going on.”
“Challenge accepted.”<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
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