“So my plan is, kill the hostages.”<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
“OK, let me ask you this – can we create an anecdote?”
\n“Ok, this one time, back in Germany…”
\n“NO! An antidote!”<\/p>\n
“Balloons! We could have done it all with balloons!”<\/p>\n
“I never run out of ammo… I have unlimited wits. I’ve never been at my wits end.”<\/p>\n
Question of the night: “Is throwing athletics?” (Asked 5 times now…)<\/p>\n
“They’re posts… not… posts…”
\n“You mean guard towers?”
\n“…Yeah. Language. Right.”<\/p>\n
“The nine-foot man is not going to be… but the hostages might…”<\/p>\n
“Earnest, calm them down.”
\n“CALM DOWN!”<\/p>\n
“Everybody, cut off your foot!”<\/p>\n
“That’s because if I point a gun at you, you’d cut off my arm.”<\/p>\n
“It’s not that I don’t suspect you, it’s that I can’t accuse you.”<\/p>\n
“I like how nobody’s accusing the psychopath with the knives.”<\/p>\n
“That’s why I kick you twice. Click, click.”<\/p>\n
“Who set the American on puree, by the way?”<\/p>\n
“The good news is, there’s a lot of blood around.”
\n“You can’t just scoop it up in a bowl and use it!”
\n“I can…”<\/p>\n
“By that I mean that his unconscious form was left laying in front of the door.”<\/p>\n
“Take this. … It’s called a radio.”<\/p>\n
“I drank the radio! Sorry!”<\/p>\n
“At this distance, it looks like vines all over Canada, choking it to death.”<\/p>\n
“You should have buried me! Why did you not flush me down the loo?”<\/p>\n
“Your fish is one of the fighting Quebecois!”<\/p>\n
“Francophonic back-bacon lover!”<\/p>\n
“No, this is the 1920s. They only have one truck.”<\/p>\n
“Do you have a radio?”
\n“I do! I drank it, remember?”<\/p>\n
“They’ve made their mistake. They’re on my turf.”
\n“…Weren’t they always on your turf?”<\/p>\n
“No, no, he equipped his plane with gay-dar!”<\/p>\n
“This mountain has rusted. It’s got tetanus.”<\/p>\n
“I’m not sure my phone likes being referred to as ‘semi-intelligent.'”<\/p>\n
“That is a manly fucking phone!”
\n“…Nice curves.”
\n“Does your husband know you have a phone like that?”<\/p>\n
“Because he always has the mixing of a fine martini on hand.”
\n“And rollerskates!”<\/p>\n
“Mei Ling’s dad had a threesome, with twins.”
\n“Yeah, but you shot the man in his Pollock.”<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
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