“Oh, it’s not a red curtain, sorry.\u00a0 It’s a reed curtain.”
\n
\n“I loot the reed curtain.\u00a0 Are there reeds?”<\/p>\n
“So there are two exits, the one we’re in front of…”
\n“That’s an entrance.”<\/p>\n
“It’s a one-way reed curtain…”<\/p>\n
“I am terrified by this curtain.”<\/p>\n
“This.\u00a0 This will be my custard machine.”<\/p>\n
“Dirty, wafer-munching papist.”<\/p>\n
“That’s what happens when you get Sarah and Bryan together: hostage gumbo.”<\/p>\n
“…I can also use my powers to morph fire into cheese crackers.”<\/p>\n
“Plants fucking hate us moveable things.”<\/p>\n
“Do not confuse the nitroglycerin for the lube…”<\/p>\n
“The choice she offers is a female halfling or a dwarf of indeterminate gender…”<\/p>\n
“Did you just do Wonder Pets, Kacey?”
\n“…I have a four year old.\u00a0 Yep.”
\n“YOU don’t have a four year old.\u00a0 How do YOU know Wonder Pets?”<\/p>\n
“Well, if I was where she was, I wouldn’t need you to communicate with her!”<\/p>\n
“Kacey, I’m sure it’s a nice enough penis, but I haven’t friended it on Facebook.”<\/p>\n
“…And this still isn’t the funniest story I’ve heard about your penis.”<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
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