“But in the grand scheme of things, a super duck really isn’t that much of a threat!”
\n
\n“Dude, if anyone ever gives ME a dwarven steamer…”
\n“That was EXACTLY what was running through my head!”<\/p>\n
“We haven’t even started yet, and I’m getting written up.”<\/p>\n
“This is why I think all comic book team-ups are doomed to fail.\u00a0 One, they put the Hulk in it…”<\/p>\n
“It’s a box of parts.\u00a0 It will eventually become an axe-throwing maniac.\u00a0 But right now it’s a box of parts.”<\/p>\n
“We just know that there’s some sort of problem in the lake near him.\u00a0 Hey!\u00a0 Take care of your water!”<\/p>\n
“They don’t have a tower.\u00a0 They have a quarry.\u00a0 The alchemists’ quarry.”<\/p>\n
“‘Cthulhu, why do you need my permission to come out?’\u00a0 ‘Well, you know, it would be rude.'”<\/p>\n
“This is the first chance we’ve given your character to talk.\u00a0 Can he even speak??”<\/p>\n
“Dog licker?\u00a0 Yes.\u00a0 He called me a dog licker.”
\n“It’s the new insult.”<\/p>\n
“Tell us what you say.\u00a0 Because the king interprets the written word differently.”<\/p>\n
“Baron Alexei writes in a flowery language I didn’t think your majesty would appreciate.”
\n“I assumed he wrote in crayon…”<\/p>\n
“That makes more sense.\u00a0 ‘We are out of spoons.\u00a0 When you come to town, would you please bring egg salad?’…”<\/p>\n
“I’m actually mighty impressed that their sewage system opened a portal to an old world.”<\/p>\n
“I didn’t know halfling… nuggets… could do that?”<\/p>\n
“‘Summon accuser.’\u00a0 It summons some guy that just goes, ‘Mmm, it was you!'”<\/p>\n
“Burn down the lake.”
\n“I think we can do it.\u00a0 We’ve got a lot of fire.”<\/p>\n
“So you’re a kite?”<\/p>\n
“Is there any particular reason you’re making an enemy for life?”
\n“No.”
\n“Of the master assassin…”<\/p>\n
“This is the end of Cerebrosgrad.\u00a0 I never should have invited – actually, I DIDN’T invite the alchemist…”<\/p>\n
“I don’t know why that’s funny.”
\n“Why is that funny?”
\n“Because he’s going to be paste…”<\/p>\n
“How do you know you’ve had a bad day?\u00a0 If you’re made of water and you’re on fire.”<\/p>\n
“I think we just found a Tick character: Buttery Justice.”<\/p>\n
“Yes.\u00a0 The head of buttery justice!”
\n“The LOVE butter of justice.”<\/p>\n
“The bagel of injustice.”<\/p>\n
“Just remember: if you kill him… we won’t care.”
\n“Wow!\u00a0 The nation’s economy has taken an upturn!”<\/p>\n
“So the water melon comm… Water elemental…”<\/p>\n
“So at the water elemental community meeting – ‘What happened?’\u00a0 ‘I was punched to death by a kite.'”<\/p>\n
“Well, they’re not necessarily going to destroy the city.\u00a0 They just weren’t made with the most stringent safety standards…”
\n“Right.\u00a0 Morally ambiguous fireworks…”<\/p>\n
“Buggering a dead swan is worse than fisting a horse… and that’s going to get Twittered, isn’t it?”<\/p>\n
“I like how, all the things we say, and he has to say buggering.”<\/p>\n
“It does get used more often.”
\n“And so does the swan.”<\/p>\n
“This game is over.”
\n“No, I want to know what you guys are doing with the unbuggered swans.”<\/p>\n
“I’m not sure if you guys are going to kill this or befriend it.”<\/p>\n
[in unison] “Flying owlbear cavalry!”<\/p>\n
“Oh, it’s a wild accusation demon!”<\/p>\n
“It’s almost like swords are dangerous!”<\/p>\n
“She gave you more information than she ever has!”
\n“I don’t think so!\u00a0 Let me go through the notes!”<\/p>\n
“It’s no incorporeal!\u00a0 It’s gay!”<\/p>\n
“They’re all going to have crackpot theories!”
\n“This whole thing is a crackpot theory!”<\/p>\n
“It’s still dead, by the way.”
\n“Well, this is not the character that cares.\u00a0 I’m carrying a dead duck.”
\n“It also did not suddenly become a duck.\u00a0 It’s a swan.”<\/p>\n
“So I carried the duck for nothing?”
\n“…Not even a little bit.”<\/p>\n
“The rogue can search for traps.”
\n“How do I search for traps again?”<\/p>\n
“No, but I think I have just closed the gateway behind us with my buttcheeks.”<\/p>\n
“I mean, that’s like the sphincter of space and time there.”<\/p>\n
“My buttcheeks are now the event horizon.”<\/p>\n
“Second thing, can we identify what that pulse was?”
\n“Feng’s buttcheeks closing.”
\n“Feng’s ass closes, things glow…”<\/p>\n
“Feng’s ass does not make the internet a better place.”
\n“I disagree.”<\/p>\n
“I have one of those things that shines light!”
\n“A peasant with a torch?\u00a0 We hate when you call us that!”<\/p>\n
“I find that having multiple-choice prophesies works best for me.”<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
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