“You’ve accepted your fate?\u00a0 Well, I can’t save you.”
\n
\n“Oh, you called Dr. Fate?\u00a0 I’m Dr. Inevitable Fate.”<\/p>\n
“I want to be Dr. Inevitable Fate!\u00a0 I’ll stand around and do nothing.”<\/p>\n
“I’m not sure even a werewolf would survive a nuclear bomb on its back.”
\n“The Rifts rulebook begs to differ.”<\/p>\n
“In Canada, it’s worth 10 cents!”
\n“That means it’s really worth 4 cents.”<\/p>\n
“THAT’s the thing you’re going to forbid me from doing again?”<\/p>\n
“You don’t expect a temple of secrets to tell you stuff, do you?”<\/p>\n
“‘Cause remember, the member of the party that could get answers out of a dead guy died.”<\/p>\n
“I don’t have my computer tonight, so I’m not going to be useful.”
\n“And this is different from normal?”
\n“And that is a perfectly reasonable response…”<\/p>\n
“There’s a shoe shortage somewhere in the world, and I have to go solve it…”<\/p>\n
“And if we REALLY want to go fast, we run up your underwear…”
\n“And then we’ll be rocket-powered, from all the flames!”<\/p>\n
“The SS Deathtrap is still afloat?”
\n“Yes, and we’ve failed to get rid of Captain Swift.”
\n“I tried to mutiny three times!”<\/p>\n
“Better than going south around the northern point.\u00a0 CRRRK.”
\n“Full speed ahead!”<\/p>\n
“Wait, if we lift it up on the oars, we can make little legs!”<\/p>\n
“Oh, that’s right, we do get to vote.\u00a0 Because you were dumb enough to leave that in.”<\/p>\n
“How is your kraken doing?”
\n“He asked the same thing last week.\u00a0 Last time I opened the jug, he seemed angry, so I closed the jug.\u00a0 I don’t think we’ve fed him since the last dead body.\u00a0 So if we get a dead body, I’m going to need that.”<\/p>\n
“Oh, now you’re taking HIS side.”
\n“No, I just don’t want to ever be on that ship!\u00a0 I’m immune to a lot of things, but I don’t think that’s one of them…”<\/p>\n
“We can’t find another captain, steal him, and then make him captain!”<\/p>\n
“I feel like everything on this ship starts with the butt of SOMETHING.”<\/p>\n
“We just discussed that flag of parlay means get up close to them and attack.\u00a0 Do you think we’re the first to have come up with this?”<\/p>\n
“Did you think we invented lying?”<\/p>\n
“I believe we’ve already played the game of ‘what we shouldn’t name ships.'”<\/p>\n
“I’m two levels behind anyway.”
\n“What?\u00a0 How are you two levels behind?”
\n“I haven’t updated my character sheet.”<\/p>\n
“By definition, he is not taller than himself and cannot be a lesbian.\u00a0 Therefore, he loves cock.”<\/p>\n
“I told you, we’re exchanging a greeting salvo.”<\/p>\n
“Well, at least now if the World Cup is a disaster, they can say, ‘at least there were no decapitations.'”<\/p>\n
“You are confused.”
\n“Always.”
\n“But now you are mechanically confused.”
\n“Always.\u00a0 I’ve spent three weeks trying to figure out how to plug LEDs into my motorcycle.\u00a0 I am mechanically confused.”<\/p>\n
“Maybe if you carried around a quiver of specialized throwing shoes…”
\n“There we go.\u00a0 One very nice shoe of returning.”<\/p>\n
“And I quote, ‘All I can do is not interrupt the group.'”
\n“Hey, I made it an entire hour.”
\n“And now you’re out of magazine?”<\/p>\n
“And technically the dicks were all Jon.”<\/p>\n
“Dude, how many hours have you been baking that troll?”<\/p>\n
“I’m just trying to not be a distraction, like I wasn’t being a distraction before until I failed.”<\/p>\n
“Brian, we need to forge the surrender document.”
\n“I’m already five pages ahead of you.”<\/p>\n
“I believe your platform, sir, was ‘I’m not Mary T and I’m not a fish man.'”<\/p>\n
“I cannot speak to you in a normal voice any more…”
\n“You haven’t spoken to me in a normal voice in weeks.”<\/p>\n
“You guys said you didn’t feel like you were railroaded enough, so here you go.”<\/p>\n
“Oh, yes.\u00a0 We want your ring and equal rights for fishmen on your ship.”<\/p>\n
“Inquisitor of Besmara.\u00a0 I am obligated to enforce the pirate… thing.”<\/p>\n
“You CAN have half a rope golem!”
\n“No you can’t.\u00a0 Then you just have 2 small rope golems.”<\/p>\n
“Well, maybe there’s a patron saint of springals in Pathfinder.”<\/p>\n
“Fly.\u00a0 Not Sly.\u00a0 No casting of any spell on us could ever make us sly.”<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
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