“Surely there’s someone out there who wants to be gelatinous.”
\n
\n“In fact, we should intentionally go there because Matt loves dinosaurs.\u00a0 Because he’s not here.”<\/p>\n
“This is going to come back to haunt us.”
\n“Most things do.”<\/p>\n
“Remember when we went to bowl, and Kevin drew us a combat map?”<\/p>\n
“What is the Slithering Coast?”
\n“Well, it’s near the Hufflepuff…”<\/p>\n
“And their food has a weird wang that sits on my tongue.”
\n“Yeah, I hate weird wang on my tongue.”<\/p>\n
“It’s just water.\u00a0 You’re pirates!”
\n“I don’t like water!\u00a0 Why do you think I need a boat?”<\/p>\n
“I’m the peeping pirate!”<\/p>\n
“Mmmm.\u00a0 Barnacle sauce.”<\/p>\n
“So someone has real legs.”<\/p>\n
“He’s with you all the time and does nothing?”
\n“What’s he going to do?\u00a0 He’s a fucking monkey.”<\/p>\n
“There you go.\u00a0 He keeps me well-groomed.”<\/p>\n
“There’s no stakes… no spikes… no.”
\n“Good.\u00a0 Because I’ve fallen for that before.”<\/p>\n
“Sweet.\u00a0 We just found our base of operations.\u00a0 Because we blew up the last one.”
\n“Because this looks so secure – a circle of water and bamboo…”<\/p>\n
“[It looks like] they were building…”
\n“A boat?”
\n“More like a jacuzzi.”<\/p>\n
“That’s the captain’s house.”
\n“I know.\u00a0 We’re going to find out what’s going on.\u00a0 And possibly rob him.”<\/p>\n
“Hello?\u00a0 I’m trapped in a box.\u00a0 I just came in here for a sandwich…”<\/p>\n
“You didn’t search for traps, did you?\u00a0 Let that be a lesson…”<\/p>\n
“Well, the easy way is to just spring the trap and move on.”<\/p>\n
“Do you really think the kraken is nit-picky?”
\n“Yes.”<\/p>\n
“It’s a little far from Dinosaur Island, though.”
\n“Maybe they wandered.”<\/p>\n
“You could try not rolling terribly.”<\/p>\n
“What’s fleshy and white and likes to swim?”
\n“Belugas?”<\/p>\n
“Why would they be swimming if they’re dead people?”
\n“They could be programmed to.”<\/p>\n
“You keep your lips off my shell.”<\/p>\n
“So Darryl, it’s really just me and you that are dumb as bricks.”<\/p>\n
“Mary, would you care to know what your armor does?”
\n“Sure, that’d be hot.\u00a0 I was just going to wear it until it breaks.”<\/p>\n
“Yeah, let’s start with the parlay thing; that worked so well last time.”<\/p>\n
“Well, I can talk like a bandit, so… let’s go.”<\/p>\n
“I thought it was you guys going on about the sex tent.”
\n“That’s okay.\u00a0 Now we have enough money to buy a sex pavilion.”<\/p>\n
“We can stop by the Rock and see all the dead people…”
\n“Can we sell them?”
\n“I’m sure we can.”<\/p>\n
“Well, he also has the ship we don’t want because it’s death.”<\/p>\n
“Look, I didn’t blow it up.\u00a0 I just rigged a situation where they blew it up themselves.”<\/p>\n
“I don’t remember that part.\u00a0 That was not the part I was watching for.”<\/p>\n
“I don’t think Kacey knows how girls work.”<\/p>\n
“What, is this some sort of ‘bargaining’ you’re suggesting?\u00a0 I always just play sticker price.”
\n“I was suggesting torturing her!”<\/p>\n
“I think we got ripped off, because we’re pirates.\u00a0 We shouldn’t pay for anything.”<\/p>\n
“Okay, just to make you guys happy, we’ll torture the next person we talk to.”
\n“Umm… Captain, can I have a word?”<\/p>\n
“You get Linguistics but you don’t get Knowledge: History?”
\n“Weirdest bard ever.”<\/p>\n
“Sadly, my first choice for skeleton queen is on vacation.”<\/p>\n
“We should establish a Former Skeleton Queens of Port Peril Pleasure Cruise!”<\/p>\n
“Take off the pirate hat and put on the con artist hat for a moment, set all this up, and then put the pirate hat on again…”<\/p>\n
“Because Mary T really wants to be the belle of the ball.”<\/p>\n
“They’re expecting you to go,” [roll] “oh, that ship belongs to Deathy McDeatherson, killer of all things.”<\/p>\n
“‘We thought better of it… it’s just a dress… just Mary T’s hopes and dreams…'”<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
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