“Raise your hand if the idea of me without a shirt on does not make you want to throw up a little?”
\n
\n“One of these days, you guys will meet my brother and see a real yeti.”<\/p>\n
“Are there cryptozoologists hunting him down?”<\/p>\n
“I didn’t know where John came from.\u00a0 I thought he just came with the room.”<\/p>\n
“All right.\u00a0 Let’s get ready to FUMMMBLLLEEEE!”<\/p>\n
“I’ve tried to paint him a few times; he keeps parrying the brush away.”<\/p>\n
“I want to roll my shitty attacks first and my good attacks second.\u00a0 Is that something we can do?”<\/p>\n
“I don’t know how guns work!\u00a0 I know how axes work!”<\/p>\n
“If I die and come back and have my two hero points, I’m just going to throw axes at Darryl.”<\/p>\n
“The amount of shit you’re full of, sir…”
\n“I try to keep it consistent.”<\/p>\n
“He is the only member of your party that has a trustworthy accent.”<\/p>\n
“OK, Swift, two marines are attacking you.”
\n“Never!\u00a0 …They hit.”<\/p>\n
“Also, with two ballista bolts and a lightning strike, I don’t think she thinks life is worth living.”<\/p>\n
“Everything is anti-Jaguar propaganda.\u00a0 The Jacksonville Jaguars are anti-Jaguar propaganda.”<\/p>\n
“Is it Voltron?”
\n“Yes.\u00a0 Guesss who gets to be the penis?”<\/p>\n
“Giant lion robo-dick is where I draw the line.”<\/p>\n
“I laugh in the face of danger!\u00a0 As long as danger is WAY over there.”<\/p>\n
“Yeah, that should miss him and Charlie.”
\n“So when you say miss, you mean definitely hit?”<\/p>\n
“Some would say grappled, others would say wedged.”<\/p>\n
“Yammy, you’ve been playing with us for 8 years; I promise, next game I’ll respect you for one session.”<\/p>\n
“I was about to say… by the time the rest of the party gets here, there’s a whopping three people on deck.\u00a0 Go team!”<\/p>\n
“Yammy, I just gave your ship away; hope you don’t care.”<\/p>\n
“Hold on, I can’t write that fast.\u00a0 I’m at ‘Broad Rudder’.”
\n“Wasn’t that the first one..?”<\/p>\n
“We can form ship-polo teams!”<\/p>\n
“‘Sir, there are sails on the horizon!’ ‘What class of ship?’ ‘All of them.'”<\/p>\n
“Ham Night Shamaylan?”
\n“Ham Night was great, but we didn’t expect the twist at the end?”<\/p>\n
“Can you tweet that? ‘Bryan suggested something that wasn’t regrettably stupid.'”<\/p>\n
“Unless you’re fascinatingly incompetent.”
\n“Uh…”<\/p>\n
“Well, I was gonna say, ‘I’m not really comfortable enslaving them; I was thinking more we’d buy them, promise them their freedom, and then leave them to die on an island.’\u00a0 But Kacey took it to a really dark place, and I think I want to go home now.”<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
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