“Will this be a pants optional Call of Cthulhu game?”
\n<\/p>\n
“I have yet to guillotine any of my friends.”<\/p>\n
“We were on a medium-speed pursuit.”<\/p>\n
“I need a book that I don’t actually want.”
\n“Don’t look at my books!”<\/p>\n
“He’s also told us specifically, ‘Do not pick at the rust. It’s structural rust.'”<\/p>\n
“What do you mean by that?”
\n“I mean just ignore the crunching sounds from the engine bay…”<\/p>\n
“Do you, perchance, remember how we left the Wheel?”
\n“Screaming?”<\/p>\n
“I cannot verify the ability of your Rodians, but these Rodians gunned down my guards.”<\/p>\n
“They’re Klingon hug dungeons.”<\/p>\n
“Perhaps Captain Nihilism was a poor choice…”<\/p>\n
“Where are the sidewalks?”
\n“Better yet, where are the repulsor tubes?”
\n“Can you call for a lift?”<\/p>\n
“I haven’t seen this many people eager to probe me since my bachelor party.”
\n“And most of them were paid.”<\/p>\n
“Can you control how much you suck?”<\/p>\n
“No matter who runs the game, they do the same thing.”
\n“We’re not doing it to you; we’re just terrible people.”<\/p>\n
“WHY DID WE MISS YOU?”<\/p>\n
“I’ve never heard of a Wookiee described as a woodland creature…”<\/p>\n
“Are we talking Wookiee thumb or Rodian thumb?”<\/p>\n
“Why would the giant jungle cats pull out his blaster?”<\/p>\n
“Really? You’re going for Lamarkian evolution there?”<\/p>\n
“We are the selfie people.”
\n“No, the selfie people are descended from us.”<\/p>\n
“There’s a few bugs in here, but the flight computer looks like it’s still intact. So someone should come get this, and I’m gonna… go find some lotion…”<\/p>\n
“I don’t think the bugs crushed him.”
\n“You don’t know that.”<\/p>\n
“Well, when I write my travel guide, my first line is going to be, ‘Don’t get stung.’ My second line is going to be, ‘Why did you come here?'”<\/p>\n
“You just… really like saying truncheon.”<\/p>\n
“I have strong discipline. I don’t have to imagine things like that.”<\/p>\n
“I heard something about a tentacle-y mess. I’m not sure this is the game I signed up for.”<\/p>\n
“Everybody gets free steriods.”<\/p>\n
“I did take the Combat Billing specialty feat.”<\/p>\n
“A third arboreal octopus… I didn’t make them up!”<\/p>\n
“Oh, well, then we’re doomed! Heavy clothing is no match!”<\/p>\n
“Oh! Arboreal octopi! Their weakness is that they can’t survive without a head.”<\/p>\n
“In a universe full of advanced laser weapons, why are you all using primitive weaponry?”<\/p>\n
“When you say you have to be second in line, does that mean behind the bodyguards or just second in line?”
\n“Second.”
\n“Then we’re gonna leave.”<\/p>\n
“What if I try to fondle you?”
\n“I’m not guarded against you. I’ll just have to take that chance.”<\/p>\n
“As a team, we’re going to have to trust each other not to fondle each other in combat situations.”<\/p>\n
“So I have a problem with Scathing Tirade. It doesn’t make sense to yell at an octopus, but nowhere does it say it has to understand you.”<\/p>\n
“You are a very poor jungle creature! You’ve made poor evolutionary choices!”<\/p>\n
“You make poor evolutionary sense!”<\/p>\n
“Fur and tentacles are not etiquette for this temperature!”<\/p>\n
“You’re going for the Bigger Fish defense?”<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
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