“Oh, it’s not a red curtain, sorry. It’s a reed curtain.”
“I loot the reed curtain. Are there reeds?”
“So there are two exits, the one we’re in front of…”
“That’s an entrance.”
“It’s a one-way reed curtain…”
“I am terrified by this curtain.”
“This. This will be my custard machine.”
“Dirty, wafer-munching papist.”
“That’s what happens when you get Sarah and Bryan together: hostage gumbo.”
“…I can also use my powers to morph fire into cheese crackers.”
“Plants fucking hate us moveable things.”
“Do not confuse the nitroglycerin for the lube…”
“The choice she offers is a female halfling or a dwarf of indeterminate gender…”
“Did you just do Wonder Pets, Kacey?”
“…I have a four year old. Yep.”
“YOU don’t have a four year old. How do YOU know Wonder Pets?”
“Well, if I was where she was, I wouldn’t need you to communicate with her!”
“Kacey, I’m sure it’s a nice enough penis, but I haven’t friended it on Facebook.”
“…And this still isn’t the funniest story I’ve heard about your penis.”