“But some people are different. Some people have seen less Schwarzenegger movies than I have.”
“Reinheit’s the best man.”
“The horse does not sleep in my room! He only appears when there’s trouble!”
“So when there’s a thunderstorm…”
“It’s not my fault we’re thunder-buddies!”
“Hoon! They’re crafty little dancers! They’ll shake anything that’s not nailed down!”
“She can’t move, but she’ll never fall down!”
“It’s the world’s first steampunk wedding dress!”
“It goes on like Iron Man’s armor and walks her down the aisle whether she wants to go or not.”
“I hire a group of engineers not burdened by morals to do a fireworks display for us…”
“Why morally ambiguous?”
“I want it to be awesome!”
“It was extremely convinced to come devour our city on this memorial day.”
“They’re like paladins! You can’t eat the shell, but the meat inside was fantastic!”
“Morally ambiguous fireworks!”
“It was a wonderful celebration – 27 courses, and only 6 peasants caught on fire!”
“They give you a bill for 1000 pingpong balls.”
“I hand it to the treasurer…”
“For those of you without the benefit of a long, sticky tongue, we have Feng to lengthen it for you.”
“As in professional kobolds.”
“As opposed to the amature kobolds.”
“Don’t druids despoil nature despoilerers.”
“For the next three months, the kingdom considers it your duty to sire an heir.”
“Would that be riding? Because if it is, I got a 27.”
“Okay. I don’t want to decide what kind of check it is to determine whether you get your wife pregnant.”
“I do nothing to prevent the creation of smaller Andrii.”
“What?! We spent 2 hours setting up a wedding, 7 seconds having sex, and then she dies?!”
“Well, if my wife is dead, what I really need is the spell Raise Child.”
“I don’t know that childbirth counts as a Death effect.”
“…all without spilling the glass of absinthe she was drinking when the chimera attacks.”
“Okay, that’s just too far.”