“Twice the doors, half the danger!”
“Sure.”
“I reached for the spirits, and I got… the spirits.”
“I appreciate you giving me this set of dice, but I’m never rolling this d20 again. Seven specters swing at you.”
“So you’re saying I’m more upset about the disappearing mead?”
“How many can I catch in a line?”
“Three.”
“How many can I get if I don’t care if I hit Magnus?”
“…Two?”
“I don’t know what that was, but I don’t approve!”
“Half-elves. They experience everything through their mouths.”
“We’re not dogs!”
“It can hold one warrior, or two of these.”
“One warrior or no warriors.”
“I like how I didn’t even get counted in that.”
“Do they feel like jerky when I touch them?”
“NO.”
“That’s the great thing: Kacey can speak with dead. He can’t hear what they’re saying…”
“Hundreds of skulls fall out of the space behind the door.”
“Oh, that’s weird.”
“That’s unsanitary.”
“What if I cast arcane lock backwards?”
“OK, so I realize we’re already in initiative because someone threw a rock into a void, but I realy need a nap.”
“And because he’s failed his save, he’s now on fire. On the inside. And he puts off 30 ft of light.”
“Weren’t you the one that wanted a nap?”
“Yeah, no, I decided I’m fine.”
“Just because you have no teeth doesn’t mean you can’t say my race.”
“You let them eat soap. It’s been several hours. We aren’t going back.”
“‘Where’d you get all these magic items?’ ‘I definitely didn’t kill a bunch of wizards and stuff them into magic items.'”
“It’s a wizard roach motel! They come in, and they die.”
“I already have a bag of many things.”
“Those are things you’ve collected.”
“Yeah!”
“Sweet. While I was drinking mead, you were doing things productively.”
“14 does not hit well. What’s wrong with you?”
“I’m rolling dice.”
“And I give it the ol’ right hook of Thor…”
“So it broke through, realized it forgot its wallet, and broke back through…”
“So this is where evil naps?”
“Come back after eating soup for 30 years.”
“I’m in Ravenloft. The chances I’m going to live that long are slim.”