“No, my limitation is ‘too embarrassed to use.'”
“See, you use the power absorption to pretend you have any power other than water breathing.”
“Oh, how cute. The tinkertoys are arguing.”
“So your superhero identity is Edmund Fitzgerald.”
“We have three and three? One… two… three four five six… seven…”
“Oh. Uh… we have four and three.”
“I’m from alien country! Why do you care?!”
“Why are you hung up on what body of water I come from?!”
“Because your most important power is water breathing!”
“I got a whole Village People of people here.”
“Flight and gliding?! There are rules?! Nobody told me!”
“Sorry to derail it already, but…”
“I’ve been in this country before all of you showed up and tried to take this country. So technically, you’re the invaders.”
“Right.”
“Awkward, isn’t it.”
“You were having a picnic on the National Mall in a snowstorm.”
“…I am from Canada.”
“Is it a crime to shoot snowmen? Just asking for a friend.”
“That’s oddly specific.”
“That’s Jason. Have you met Jason?”
“Does that count as a force attack?”
“No, that was the neighbor.”
“The National Mall looks like a used tampon!”
“I will activate my gravimetric cannon and swoop down to see what’s killing what.”
“I’m going to go ahead and fire off Chekov’s gun and throw a train at these guys.”
“The ice mafia! The Frostfather.”
“Somebody’s opening dimensional portals.”
“No, that was the cat coming in from the back room.”
“I mean, I can find Odin’s birds, but they’re kind of arseholes, even for ravens.”
“What can you tell us about your king? We’d like to open diplomatic relations – “
“Well, I’m pretty sure you’ll be dead. They won’t be back until… 2537.”
“So would it be safe to say your people do not pose an existential threat to the United States of America.”
“I’m not sure they know you exist, to be honest. The last time they were here was 1537.”
“You are so defensive about the water-breathing! You’re going to bring it up in every conversation.”
“I’ll have the chicken pot pie and oxygen like a normal person!”
“No, I don’t swim. I just sulk.”
“Do you answer truthfully?”
“No. Because I don’t actually have answers to a lot of the questions.”
“If you guys need to roll to open a storage unit that’s locked, you’re not superheroes.”
“Weird alien beings don’t have storage lockers.”
“He has storage lockers.”
“I have an apartment!”
“How is your mother?”
“Fine? She’s been dead for three years.”
“No, your birth mother.”
“SHIELD had you in their office.”
“And I am aware. I will never be that person again.”
“You are remarkably level-headed about all of this. Because I’m from another world, and I’m freaking out about this. That guy was throwing a bus, and there was a train… Did you know there’s an army of robots? I went out for pizza!”
“We have dossiers on all of you.”
“I’d like to look at mine, because I put no thought into my alien race or background.”
“Wolverine kills people.”
“Wolverine is one of the miracles of modern storytelling, because we have a character beloved by children who has knife hands.”
“I know that quote. I sleep on couches.”
“I have like 3 gallons of Aztec blood at home that I got on eBay for like 75 cents. Dude, you leave it everywhere!”
“So you’re just a big sack of balls, is what you’re saying?”
“I can also show you what it looks like when you’re a year older, but it’s not reversible.”
“I just realized that the three of us can’t go anywhere alone. Itza-pizza-Pie.”
“I forgot what a strange and unusual experience GMing you guys is.”
“By the way, I take it back when I said, ‘Why are you here? You seem normal.’ I realize that was eleven years ago…”
“My name’s Jeffrey, I’ll be your shady dealer tonight…”
“I’ve never seen a roleplaying game with its own penal code; this is great.”