“Can I borrow this?”
“Yep. It’s not mine, but you can borrow it.”
“Who fell down?”
“I mean, to be fair, I got pimp-slapped by a god.”
“It’s the same thing that will give you advantage when the time comes to make gas saves.”
“Sorry in advance.”
“Do you have gas?!”
“So dragons, volcano, angry god, Splitboulder… Does anyone else have any enemies we need to know about?”
“I think the question is more how quickly I can disembowel the ones stopping me from getting into the cave.”
“If I’m alone, I can move stealthily at a normal pace. So I’m 8 feet to the left of everyone else.”
“You can melt it down if you throw it into the lava and then pull it out really quickly.”
“You just described meat.”
“I’m incredibly nimble for my species, which means I’m just as nimble as everyone else.”
“Your people don’t live epochs – that’s her people.”
“I can make your family line live on into the next epoch!”
“As long as they continue to have the Favored Enemy…”
“What’s your initiative?”
“One.”
“Kade, what’s yours?”
“Three.”
“And he out-rolled me.”
“You have a class feature that gives you a second attack! It’s call Talfin!”
“‘Before things went bad’ was a long, long time ago.”
“Remember, you don’t always have to have Darryl touch you – you can also touch yourself.”
“But I spent all my actions touching this rax.”
“I have a dilemma.”
“You should get that looked at.”
“It is going after Palad, because there’s nothing more fun than going after a naked halfling.”
“On the bright side, I’ve established that I need to roll 3 d20s to hit.”
“Ander! That’s the one I call ‘deli meat’!”
“Hey, I’m not gonna be the first one to make a new character!”
“No, ’cause inside the mouth – the roof of the mouth ain’t 22 AC.”
“Yeah, but you have to get through the cone of fire first!”
“I’m seldom this bloodthirsty!”
“Bryan, your enthusiasm is delightful. I’m already mourning your character, but you’re delightful.”
“And this is how there are no halflings in this epoch.”
“He’s got to do the math. That’s a bucketload of d10s – “
“I actually don’t have enough d10s.”
“Oh, shit.”
“You don’t get to die, but you do get to suffer for a while.”
“I feel like the only way we can stop the halfling death threats is to get Hawver to make a character.”
“So what you’re saying is that he’s only slightly worse than halflings.”
“You didn’t notice me salivating, did you? Because you guys smell really good.”
“That’s her line.”
“Pete’s complicit in this.”
“Pete’s equally curious.”
“I was actually considering eating one myself, so this is much better.”
“If the pteradon can vomit boulders, I’m pretty sure the pteradon would be lying on the ground.”
“Wait, wait, are we in a narrow, confined space? Let’s do the explosion.”
“Maybe we should be less dramatic when we arrive. Maybe not bash raxes into oblivion and hit them with lightning.”
“I don’t think you understand our idiom.”
“I love average. Bell curve, nothin’ – it’s a straight friggin’ line.”
“How have we already progressed to redneck? We don’t have written language.”
“I’m not afraid.”
“You’re also not very smart.”
“I didn’t invent lying, right? That already existed?”
“Two weeks pass… with this inane conversation still going…”
“How many D&D games are we going to have with you where cannibalism is involved?”
“Yeah, you guys took on 2 raxes.”
“Two point one.”