“You went to all that effort to have a vision to decide the fate of this group, and you didn’t even write it down?”
“People with masks can’t be trusted.”
“I’m wearing a mask!”
“I met you before you put it on.”
“What do you have to trade?”
“A large spider?”
“Wh-“
“No, I’m kidding. Nobody wants a large spider.”
“We have halflings.”
“But he does have endless butt rope to trade! Ask him if he wants butt rope!”
“I don’t work well underwater.”
“I have a swim speed!”
“I don’t have the spider trapped. And I’m totally not holding one of her daughters hostage.”
“So that people can navigate for themselves.”
“Learn. That’s how you navigate by yourself: learn.”
“Well, I would hate to destroy this lush and fertile… It’s a DESERT!”
“I think the important thing is that we have to save the world in order to be environmentalists.”
“Today, you see the ruins of a villain… village, god damn it.”
“Oooh, a villain. It’s Thanos!”
“You’ve been traveling with him long enough to understand his magic.”
“i’ve been traveling with him long enough to know that I don’t understand anything he’s saying.”
“Who’s side-questing now?”
“Surprisingly comfortable considering what you’re sitting on is a jawbone, yes.”
“Future generations will know him as ‘Hashtag.'”
“One might even say that they’re sharing the timeline where they’re still here.”
“What are you doing with your face and your hand?!”
“Appearing non-threatening.”
“The face doesn’t matter. She’s still wearing the spider mask.”
“And you’re trying to appear non-threatening?!”
“Intelligence 8!”
“I cannot enter where I’m not welcomed.”
“Are you a vampire now?”
“Yes! I am the first.”
“Great, you’ve confused them. Nobody’s ever asked for permission before.”
“So in the morning, if we haven’t been driven out of the town by Greyshame insisting on dissecting a camel…”
“We’ll just have to be careful.”
“Because that’s a thing we do…”
“I’m uncomfortable with this.”
“With restoring the river?”
“With agreeing with you!”
“They are almost as intelligent as camels, so be wary.”
“Do you think your son will teach me the music he’s playing?”
“Of course!”
“We’re going to be hearing this the rest of the trip, aren’t we?”
“I have one. It’s in the design of my people, so it may look a little different.”
“Is it the shape of a penis?”
“No, it is not the shape of a penis!”
“It’s a fair question.”
“Is it shaped like a penis? Don’t be absurd. Hers is shaped like an ovary.”
“That is a hunting call. They found a rat.”
“Hopefully that’s a rat and not Kacey.”
“You hear an odd, braying sound from… you guess a camel?”
“I wasn’t me – I didn’t cut it open. It’s making that sound on its own.”
“Ah, we have found the Texas part of this fantasy land.”
“I’ll go with him to keep him out of trouble.”
“…And who’s going with them to keep them out of trouble?”
“Go ahead, I’m not stopping you. I know better than to try to stop you once you’ve decided your character is doing something.”
“I’d like to make friends with it. And not the way she wants to make friends with it.”
“I am getting engaged to the mayor’s son; I am not getting friendly with the mayor’s son.”
“Well, that marriage isn’t going to last.”
“The spider goddess has million of babies. Are you prepared to father million of babies with me?”
“No, but I’m prepared to sire them and leave.”
“I don’t know – if I can piss it off as much as I pissed off the moon, then maybe I can get it to knock down the dam.”
“He is going to find out we’re a group with a million questions and a thousand attention spans.”
“Apparently it hates me.”
“You told a god it’s not a god!”
“Your guide wipes the water off his face. ‘You are not unusual in this. It hates everyone.'”