“I have a blueprint.”
“I wouldn’t have even required a blueprint!”
“I. Figured. It. Out!”
“I’m proud of you! I’ll even give you a +2 on that roll.”
“I mean, if you want to make some self-discipline water, you can, but you don’t know if it’s going to have any effect.”
“Now all we need is something to push the water out with some gravity.”
“That’s what gravity is for.”
“No, with gusto!”
“Yeah, you don’t notice anything. The smell of wet grass is really interfering with your ability to see.”
“Well, your explosives are placed correctly, but whatever those two are doing…”
“Look, if we put two here, it’ll destabilize these other four.”
“I don’t want to destabilize anything! I want to blow holes in it!”
“The dogs? Not moving. Wind? Not moving. Air? Not moving.”
“Dog tipping!”
“If y’all were putting up strings of explosives, I would have allowed homemaking, because it’s just like Christmas lights.”
“What about ‘Juicy Rationalization?’ That’s a skill, right?”
“That’s it. The next thing I’m building is the dildo cannon.”
“Jesus. Why am I rolling dice?”
“I’m not armored, Officer – this is cosplay!”
“The last time something like this happened, it was a portal. So here’s the important thing: Noah is shucking his pants faster than any man has shucked his underwear before.”
“I’m gonna go take a nap now.”
“You get plus 2 on your nap test.”
“Power nap!”
“I need you to make a perception: find trousers roll.”
“Actually, maybe I should make a roll to see if your truck provides trousers.”
“Y’all take some time, get the dogs… liberally spread…”
“Maybe it was a corn swap!”
“He’s trying to swap last year’s candy corn for this year’s corn. You should see when he brings last year’s corn to this year’s candy corn.”
“I’ve heard of weirder things.”
“Like a corn swap?”
“Like a corn swap.”
“The porn swap happens at the Chicken Strip.”
“There’s nothing like clearing your cookies after your children have been browsing porn.”
long pause
“Oh! THOSE cookies!”
“Was I huffing dead person?”
“I think you were huffing dead interdimensional people. Although you might’ve been huffing their BO.”
“I don’t wanna wear what Rick wore.”
“Nobody wants to wear what Rick wore. It’s like going to the porn swap.”
“We didn’t see Rick there…?”
“At the porn swap? No.”
“Although, if you watch long enough…”
“The rule is, it can’t be one thing, unless it’s weird, vaporous dead people.”
“I am never living down the corn swap.”
“Or the porn swap.”
“Is Undisclosed cool enough for a rave, or do we just have field parties?”
“Look, I flick the lights on and off; what more do you want?”
“It seems like no one wants to go near the blackened pants. I can’t imagine why.”
“Look, just because I’m unprepared, it doesn’t mean I’m going to go back and get prepared.”
“I mean, it’s so bright, it’s making him deaf.”