“It’s a little-known fact that all armor in 5E has a little bit of spandex…”
“I’m not looking forward to getting hit with those hands.”
“Or the students.”
“That’s why I’m not looking forward to getting hit with those hands – they’re covered in student.”
“No one can see Khleyo, but everyone knows where she is, because there’s a fountain of blood coming out of the back of the ogre.”
“I’m dodging! That’s gross and I can see it coming, so I’m dodging!”
“It looks like it’s a material between silk and velvet – “
“Mmm. Velour.” (from 2 directions)
“That’s not between silk and velvet. That’s between velvet and polyester.”
“Why would there be a pearl? It’s a wizard’s school and it’s a spell component!”
“You are slowly climbing down my favorite squishy list.”
“So you were just going to armor your fish?”
“Yes!”
“That makes more sense.”
“From now on, in this game world, ‘putting on airs’ will be referred to as ‘putting on ears.'”
“Not a fan of acid. Not a fan of vomit. Not a fan of pixies.”
“I think we’re trying to 3.5 our 5E again.”
“Well, that’s not the greatest dice I’ve ever rolled – “
“It’s just a tribute.”
“You never realized it before, but Khleyo is frightening.”
“That’s not new.”