“Are you… planning to take some other human woman to experimental German theater?”
“I need a number.”
“I’m not using 8675309 anymore, so you can have it.”
“I’m not particularly upset by it. It’s just the inside bits of humans, which I professionally open.”
“Isn’t his car still across town?”
“It doesn’t belong to me.”
“That doesn’t make it better.”
“That might make it worse.”
“So if he’s just a projection, does he have a mute button?”
“I’m not feeling around in there to find out.”
“Oh, I will.”
“Uh oh.”
“No, I’m waiting for him to ask the Accuser, because the Accuser loves experimental German theater.”
“It’s not roller derby night.”
“It is when I get there, because I’m gonna get some skates and beat the hell out of people.”
“I’m laughing because one of the alleys is covered in blood.”
“That’s how I know I’m in the right place.”
“I was trying to put it in robotic terms to make him feel better about his choices.”
“I have skill points in breaking wind!”
“There’s a subtle face shift, and I identify people by facial identification software.”
“Does that make you better or worse at recognizing people?”
“Yes.”
“She sounds like an experimental German.”
“…She is, in fact.”
“Why don’t you use your metal stick? You spent so much time describing your metal stick – why don’t you use it?”
“Ohh, look – he’s even got the vein.”
“You defeated your nemesis in one turn.”
“Not defeated – captured. Because we were told not to kill anyone.”
“That was on a usenet post! An official usenet post!”
“How many walls are there between the machine and me?”
“One…?”
“I’m gonna say no.”
“I think a better description is that I’m now in the middle of the machine and I’m going to fight my way back out.”
“It’s also a human-built Bifrost, not one being maintained by Idris Elba.”
“I had planned on the players fighting the zombies and then turning off the machine. I had not planned on the players going through the Bifrost.”
“It’s been a while since you’ve run, hasn’t it, Bryan?”
“Have you met us?”
“Which one is the self-loathing XAIR?”
“It’s gotta be one of the 70s. They all had AI issues.”
“‘Dancing Queen’?”
“It was the most roller-rink thing I could think of.”
“You and I have not been to the same kinds of roller rink.”
“You gonna smash the machine again, dancing queen?”
“I’m going to attempt to smash them, combining my blunt weapon and my… roller derby skills.”
“Bad timing. Are you going to call your girlfriend?”
“She’s not my girlfriend. She’s my technical contact.”
“He shot the Nazi, he shot the zombies, he’s shooting the bikers – he’s shooting everyone, just to make sure.”
“You’re a little darker than the other XAIRs.”
“Well, I am painted black.”
“Are you asking me on a date?”
“Based on the stress levels in your voice, I’m going to say… no?”
“Are you the one that made the machine? The BikerFrost?”
“You’ve summoned snowmen and zombies.”
“Things haven’t gone quite right.”
“Thor walks up and says, ‘What do you think about German experimental theater?'”
“Because we have his blood.”
“Did you buy it on eBay or Craigslist?”
“Did you steal blood from a Stark vault? Dude, that’s so cool – I mean. Terrible. You shouldn’t steal from people.”
“Natalie? Can we speak to Natalie?”
“Maybe?”
“Let’s speak with Tommy. He’s cool.”
“Do you know who her friends are – don’t look up her file to see who her friends are; that’s also creepy.”
“The Magpie is the hero we deserve.”
“I don’t think he is.”
“Why do all these mariachi bands keep coming across the Bifrost?”
“No, I just sent 10,000 luchadors to help Asgard.”
“Does citing the sources make you sound more authoritative? Because that wasn’t good.”
“I could pour it into the place where I’m projecting a mouth and contain it in a forcefield.”
“And then you could go into the bathroom and get rid of it later.”
“It would look exactly like pee!”
“So their codpieces are inflated.”
“Most men’s are.”
“Five karma.”
“Oh dear. Oh dear.”
“You don’t have a penis, do you.”
“Not usually.”
“Did you Google sex?”
“Oh. Uh. I’m going to have to restore from a previous save.”
“Oh. Oh. Romance.”
“Ohhh. You’re hoping for a second date.”
“Love is chaos.”
“And evil.”