“Bryan, we have agreed not to eat your suitor until your bloodline is secured.”
“…What?”
“What’s with the orcs and insulting gods? Is that just what we do?”
“If things acted in a worthy manner, I wouldn’t need to insult them.”
“I like how we all have very different memories of last session.”
“Technically, if I make you doubt me, I have power over you – and that makes me a god.”
“To be fair, I’ve never tried to argue with the moon.”
“Don’t. She’s very angry.”
“I’m Orthodox Grayshame; I eat people. None of this Reform Greyshame.”
“These two are not allowed to open doors into bodies of water anymore.”
“‘Cause somebody was throwing rocks over the edge to open up the thing.”
“Hey, I have done more than anyone else to take care of this dam.”
“So we build a giant wooden horse – “
“Fish.”
“So we build a giant wooden fish.”
“So, a boat.”
“And we get inside the giant wooden fish – “
“Like you do with a boat.”
“Try and come up with a brilliant plan that doesn’t get a bunch of people killed.”
“Oh, our plans don’t have to be brilliant; we’re not going to follow them anyway.”
“These are made out of butt-rope? I’m out.”
“It’s plant butt-rope.”
“I’m not sure if that’s better or worse. Plants don’t have butts.”
“We grow many of our plants above our homes.”
“Your homes are holes in the ground.”
“I’ve invented geometry. Done!”
“I’m down with being shot across the lake into the temple.”
“I’m not sure foreshortening has been invented yet.”
“It has now!”
“Skipping rocks and seeing in the dark are the first two tenets of my godhood.”
“That would have been a good roll.”
“And I wasted it on frivolous things.”
“No, so what it is, is they have illusionist mages and soybeans. So everything’s made out of tofu.”
“But now they’re all, ‘YAAAY, you can do it!'”
“Because they’ve never seen our plans.”
“In other worlds, it’s ‘a wizard did it.’ In this world, it’s going to be ‘Palad did it.'”
“Fish aren’t really known for construction.”
“I’m attacking whatever’s close and offensive.”
“Wait wait wait wait wait.”
“Heyyyyy.”
“It used to be I can’t see because of the dark. Now I can’t see because of the light.”
“You are kind of in the middle of a fireworks show.”
“But one of them dived towards the center of the impact, and that one looks the least happy of them all.”
“Did you think I was going to forget that? We spent way too much time talking about the sun’s butthole.”
“You told me to look out for the serpent!”
“No, that was a joke. Because you can’t see.”
“…Oh.”
“So you’re really just a graffiti artist.”
“I am the first!”
“I don’t have the ability to have an idea! This was my idea!”
“We’ve invented a ferry!”
“They’ve been here a long time.”
“Haven’t you heard of the Feywild?”
“Well, I’m not going to put yours into it.”
“You’re damned right you’re not.”
“We’re gonna regret this later.”
“We are. But not this game – we’ll regret it next game, when someone digs up the lost temple.”
“It’s like recycling.”
“It is! It’s environmentally friendly evil.”