“I feel like this is what your character would be doing anyway.”
“This is true.”
“Rules to break later: odd man out is always wrong. Not anymore!”
“And what kind of bodies are stored in the morgue?”
“…Empty ones?”
“From zero to life in a penitentiary, how much blood is on it?”
“The important thing is that I don’t see a body, even if there’s something that some people could mistake for blood.”
“Well, did you see any corpses?”
“Not in the fridge.”
“Dang it, my shoes are gone.”
“Did you check your feet?”
“But you belong here.”
“Actually, I think I don’t. I think I’m destined for something greater.”
“A studio apartment?”
“What a surprise, Sarah has a schtick.”
“Look, the dice like me when I try to pick a lock.”
“It’s Roger! Logically. He’s what lives here.”
“What lives here?”
“Is that Roger?”
“It’s an oily sack of spiders, and it’s on fire. We should go.”
“I am not okay with that. Finding bodies for you guys.”
“They’re just lying around at the funeral home.”
“And what’s the other ingredient?”
“Rust. And before you even go there, Charlene is off limits.”
“Roger was my friend. He would never turn into a bunch of spiders and try to eat me.”
“I’m going to totally not help him, in the most helpful way possible.”
“I know how that works!”
“I can’t summarize. Here.”
“So you’re saying your holy water is stale?”
“What kind of money do you use that goes ‘clank?'”
“Nobody tips the fry guy at the Waffle Hut!”
“You see what could only be described as the shadow of a couch.”
“I quietly start reading an exorcism.”
“Do you have faith in it?”
“I mostly just want to know if it works.”
“Tee apostrophe aco, H apostrophe ouse?”
“Yes. It’s in the employee handbook. It’s for legal reasons.”
“Oooh, look that one up! ‘Shape-changing multiple personalities with invisible couches.'”
“I’m going to walk up to it with the most caring, non-threatening face I can manage, because I’m terrified…”
“Dude, do I come into your house and finger your TV?”
“Let’s stop and get the bombs!”
“We should!”
“And… scene.”