“I’m just shooting for ‘not noticed by the librarian.'”
“Your bar’s a lot lower than it used to be.”
“Nobody even knows me at this school. ‘Welcome to the school!’ ‘I’ve been here for years!'”
“I’ve got it – steel sheep.”
“But they probably belong to someone.”
“There are other ways to lose popularity that I haven’t found yet?”
“Did you say ‘dramatic’ or ‘traumatic’?”
“Yes.”
“What’s the motivation for the cube? I need to get into the cube’s thought process.”
“I’m going to use minor illusion to make it look like a normal gelatinous cube and not a gelatinous cube full of psychadelic stuff. So I’m going to just make it look like a non-hypnotic gelatinous cube.”
“Did you put the gelatinous cubes up to it just so you can rescue the professor?”
“No!”
“Yeah, you didn’t realize I was the cube whisperer…”
“And this is why we can’t have nice characters.”
“And they said you’d never use the Pythagorean theorum!”
“Go to 2.”
“Okay, but I’m thinking we combine A and B.”
“What do you mean?”
“Well, if I do B and then stand by for A…”
“So in reverse alphabetical order?”
“Yes.”
“You thought the tables had a bad AC.”
“Lizard brain in the back of your head is screaming, ‘It’s eating students!’ Monkey brain in the front is going, ‘But it’s so pretty…'”
“Listen to the lizard braiiiin.”
“Be the dragon you were born to be!”
“You’re having reptile disfunction.”
“So I’m only a regular level of horrified, not a personal level of horrified.”
“There had to be a monster fucker somewhere.”
“There’s always one.”
“We have un-shorthanded the plan.”
“…Is there a spell blast into melee rule in 5E?”
“Okay, I didn’t create a disco ball. There’s too much fiber floating in it. What I’ve created is a mobile lava lamp.”
“No, this cube keeps just rolling poorly. I think it’s tainted by what’s inside of it – it keeps burping, and it’s swaying side to side…”
“Gently encouraging. Because Mage Hand can’t attack.”
“Goosing isn’t attacking.”
“Is this cube gone?”
“Yeah – well. Is it gone, or is it everywhere?”
“The two students that helped you pull out – stop it.”