“Nobody’s reported it to ME! Have you seen the crap that I get?!”
“Are you Darius or Char?”
“Uh… Darius… considering he’s Char…”
“Turtle loves taste of halfling! Halfling, halfling, halfling… Look, it’s nice and so-oft…”
“Yeah, the d8 was just kicker damage…”
“Oh, right, he’s the typo giant…”
“Christmas shrooms!”
“Christmas shrooms?”
“Yep! We’re going to cut them down and hang decorations on them!”
“Mushroom, do you have a taste for human flesh?!”
“It can vocalize… it has all the right organs… Why do I care?!”
“It’s either that, or my horse makes an escape artist check.”