“What about stuff like that?”
“Well, I have stuff.”
“What about that?”
“I like to start in media res, because that’s the best way to start.”
“So everybody has d10 physical stress!”
“Umm. My game is Earth 867-5309.”
“So… we’ve been playing for 5 minutes and the game is already ruined?”
“It’s almost like I can teleport.”
“But he’s not vomiting nearly enough.”
“He certainly is confused…”
“I’m going to put the innocents out with Mjolnir!”
“He’s not afraid of your poor grasp of geography!”
“He can’t see; he thinks he’s still in Hell’s Kitchen.”
“New superhero game: shake Daredevil and throw him at the enemy!”
“Nothing moves the Blob! Except the word of God…”
“I don’t want to blast a church, but I think it’s the best option.”
“I want to say, that as a god of an opposing religion, I condone and approve of this action.”
“But destroy the church?! I contributed to the roof fund!”
On psychics: “Yeah, you’ve gotta really worry about the ones that have hands AND blue beams.”
“I’m going to use the rubble as a ramp… and I’m going to try to take the head of that psychic clean off with my motorcycle.”
“Yeah, after a while that stops being a plot point and starts being a party trick.”
“Hell appreciates what you just did.”
“The atheist robot doesn’t understand.”
“I’m going to go stick a hand inside the Blob.”
“Ugh. You don’t know where that’s been!”
“Oh. Oh god. Is that a burrito?”
On stretchy powers: “No, we allowed it after the Manaconda. We disallowed it after the halfling penis.”
“This lightning bolt is so big, it’s the Blob of lightning bolts!”
“Wait… are you saying that Thor and Ghost Rider going off alone in the city is a bad idea?”
“Please, god, don’t let this be a buddy flick…”
“What’s the Kickstarter you want to do?”
“The first all-midget production of ‘The Best Little Whorehouse in Texas.'”
“That’s why I didn’t put the Goblin in this game! Because I knew you’d kill him and steal his glider!”
“He was run over as a child. He has the Goblin Walker.”
“No! The Goblin Segueway!”
“Thor. God of Thunder. Not God of Wisdom.”
“Hell-phone.”
“Hell-phone?”
“So you’re on AT&T.”