“Surely there’s someone out there who wants to be gelatinous.”
“In fact, we should intentionally go there because Matt loves dinosaurs. Because he’s not here.”
“This is going to come back to haunt us.”
“Most things do.”
“Remember when we went to bowl, and Kevin drew us a combat map?”
“What is the Slithering Coast?”
“Well, it’s near the Hufflepuff…”
“And their food has a weird wang that sits on my tongue.”
“Yeah, I hate weird wang on my tongue.”
“It’s just water. You’re pirates!”
“I don’t like water! Why do you think I need a boat?”
“I’m the peeping pirate!”
“Mmmm. Barnacle sauce.”
“So someone has real legs.”
“He’s with you all the time and does nothing?”
“What’s he going to do? He’s a fucking monkey.”
“There you go. He keeps me well-groomed.”
“There’s no stakes… no spikes… no.”
“Good. Because I’ve fallen for that before.”
“Sweet. We just found our base of operations. Because we blew up the last one.”
“Because this looks so secure – a circle of water and bamboo…”
“[It looks like] they were building…”
“A boat?”
“More like a jacuzzi.”
“That’s the captain’s house.”
“I know. We’re going to find out what’s going on. And possibly rob him.”
“Hello? I’m trapped in a box. I just came in here for a sandwich…”
“You didn’t search for traps, did you? Let that be a lesson…”
“Well, the easy way is to just spring the trap and move on.”
“Do you really think the kraken is nit-picky?”
“Yes.”
“It’s a little far from Dinosaur Island, though.”
“Maybe they wandered.”
“You could try not rolling terribly.”
“What’s fleshy and white and likes to swim?”
“Belugas?”
“Why would they be swimming if they’re dead people?”
“They could be programmed to.”
“You keep your lips off my shell.”
“So Darryl, it’s really just me and you that are dumb as bricks.”
“Mary, would you care to know what your armor does?”
“Sure, that’d be hot. I was just going to wear it until it breaks.”
“Yeah, let’s start with the parlay thing; that worked so well last time.”
“Well, I can talk like a bandit, so… let’s go.”
“I thought it was you guys going on about the sex tent.”
“That’s okay. Now we have enough money to buy a sex pavilion.”
“We can stop by the Rock and see all the dead people…”
“Can we sell them?”
“I’m sure we can.”
“Well, he also has the ship we don’t want because it’s death.”
“Look, I didn’t blow it up. I just rigged a situation where they blew it up themselves.”
“I don’t remember that part. That was not the part I was watching for.”
“I don’t think Kacey knows how girls work.”
“What, is this some sort of ‘bargaining’ you’re suggesting? I always just play sticker price.”
“I was suggesting torturing her!”
“I think we got ripped off, because we’re pirates. We shouldn’t pay for anything.”
“Okay, just to make you guys happy, we’ll torture the next person we talk to.”
“Umm… Captain, can I have a word?”
“You get Linguistics but you don’t get Knowledge: History?”
“Weirdest bard ever.”
“Sadly, my first choice for skeleton queen is on vacation.”
“We should establish a Former Skeleton Queens of Port Peril Pleasure Cruise!”
“Take off the pirate hat and put on the con artist hat for a moment, set all this up, and then put the pirate hat on again…”
“Because Mary T really wants to be the belle of the ball.”
“They’re expecting you to go,” [roll] “oh, that ship belongs to Deathy McDeatherson, killer of all things.”
“‘We thought better of it… it’s just a dress… just Mary T’s hopes and dreams…'”