EmeraldSilver Blogs

“This is not auction for the lowest bidder!”

[Discussing guns in vaginas…]
“I wish I hadn’t thought of that.”
“What?”
“Gives a whole new meaning to the term ‘vaginal discharge’.”

“If this taco was any messier, Bryan would be covered in barbecue sauce.”
“I already am.”

“There’s a teleport upgrade for World of Tanks?”
“Yes, it’s called Displacement, or Internet Lag.”

“Well, technically Christmas is Jesus’s birthday, so the heresy must have reset.”

“My next prize in my fucking Cracker Jacks better be a hand job.”

“And that’s just a whole other set of jokes that I’m not going to be the initiator of…”

“Keep your ears open; as I work up into speed, I’m going to work in ‘anal seepage’.”

“Diplomacy is for people who can’t punch through doors.”

“So what’s the plan, captain?”
“I don’t even remember what ocean we’re in.”