EmeraldSilver Blogs

“There is nothing worse for keeping a conflict going that communication.”

“Excellent. Knowing you are also a master of etiquette means we can play good cop bad copy.”

“I’m not really a character to be arguing with madames.”

“It’s not that there’s less racism; it’s that there’s less races.”
“You say tomato, I say toma-toh.”

“I just want you all to know: ” screaming

“Pocket sand!”
“More like face caltrops.”

“I will yell out, ‘They are tiny pianists!'”

“So it wasn’t ‘not the face’?”

“I have once again chosen the Spanish duelist, and I don’t want to hear a word, because it’s been over a decade.”

“See, it’s good to pick up random people off the street!”

“Things like where did they come from, where did they go – “
“Cotton-Eyed Joe?”
“I’m glad I’m not the only one.”

“You might come out like toothpaste on the other side, but you will go through the window.”

“Told you he took the lotion to bed. Called it.”

“That poor gecko.”
“No, it was a swan.”
“Oh, that’s all right, then. Swans are bastards.”

“Use the spirit of dousing!”
“No, no, dowsing is how you find water.”

“Also, I’m too pretty to skewer.”

“There’s grumbling. The bitterness keeps me warm.”

“I negotiated a truce.”
“I climbed out of a hole to agree to that truce.”

“I can get to a tree 5 miles away.”
“I can make a tree.”
“I can also make a tree.”
“This is the weirdest dick-measuring contest…”

“I don’t want to look a pity friendship in the mouth, but I’ll rub its horn.”

“It’s weird elemental water.”
“It’s perfectly natural water. That’s what you’ve been telling me for the last six levels.”

“It would be a really interesting Hot Ones challenge.”

“If you need to, you can duck inside my wind.”
(snickering)
“Hey, I didn’t say where that wind comes from.”

“You’re looking pretty fly for a Greek Guy.”

“We’re not gonna burn him in effigy; he’s right here!”

“It’s not bad touching.”
“But aren’t you trying to bad touch him?”
“No!”

“Come on, you can always tell by the shoulders.”

“I have a solution.”
“Who’s dead?”
“No one yet.”

“That ‘yet’ really puts some punctuation on that.”

“We would not dream of intruding on your generosity.”
“Some of us would dream…”
“We would not admit to dreaming of it.”
“Dream on the inside! Dream on the inside!”

“Sorry, can’t do meat element yet.”

“It’s this way. He flew. On a bird.”
“Or as a bird.”
“One problem at a time.”

“A warm wind blows out of the north, to the south.”
“Making the bird fly faster.”
“You don’t know; it could be just big enough for us.”
“We’re walking…”

“Call me suspicious, but…”
“You’re suspicious.”

“But who knows which way the wind is blowing?”
“I mean…”
“Yeah. Everyone in the party knows which way the wind is blowing.”

“It’s going, ‘Turn right. Turn right. Turn right.'”
several “Recalculating…”
“There are no roads, so it’s not recalculating the route. It just says, ‘Turn right.'”

“I am ready. I am prepared. There is no sneak attacking me.”

“Turning to face the party is not, in itself, an act of aggression. So I am holding my action until there is an act of aggression. And then… off with their heads.”

“I mean, if something goes wrong and the house suddenly bulges, you’ll know what’s going on.”

“There was someone that wanted us to bring them a cauldron…”
“That was a different game, Pete. That was 7th Citadel.”

“Burned, charred, and exploded is on-brand for us. The rune, not so much.”

“I’ve got like 30 different types of lycanthropy. Including the outsider type.”
“Well, I’m going to go ahead right now and tell you that the alka-seltzer version is fucking weird.”

“We’re not eating Ivermectin to cure lycanthropy. I’m sorry. I can’t.”

“They don’t seem to in any way, shape, or form want to destroy the world.”
“Well, no. That’s where all their stuff is.”

“Are we loot now?”
“Mm-hmm.”
“We’re loot. It didn’t even take a van full of candy!”

“Yeah, don’t let a burning tornado in either.”

“I didn’t see a point in drawing a burning tornado, because everybody’s seen a burning tornado.”

“To be honest, I thought the tail was a straw.”
“…That’s not a bad idea.”

“He licks your neck gently.”
“Uh, he licks the holy neck. Everything about me is holy.”

“Other dude is not your problem right now.”
“Oh, he’s my problem…”

“So it’s gone?”
“Sort of – well, it’s everywhere.”
“It’s no longer a combatant.”
“It’s now an environmental hazard.”

“It’s going to leave your area of influence.”
“No, it’s not.”
“It really needs to leave your area of influence.”
“Bold move. Let’s see how that pays off for him.”

“When did I take Intimidation?”
in unison “When you became a giant dinosaur?”

“I will try not to miss anything while rolling my eyes at the dramatics behind me.”

“Will you just get in here? There’s a hole to go down.”
“That’s not very inviting.”
“Ooh, ooh, you can be the fire in the hole!”

“I’m gonna take a deep breath, I’m gonna do a Kegel exercise, and then I’m going to put a hand on it.”

“Are you talking to the dinosaur’s butt?”
“I don’t know which way he was facing, but probably.”