EmeraldSilver Blogs

“This is exactly how you thought this was going to go, wasn’t it.”

“I kind of imagine that if you try to pick up Nine, it’s not so much that you get actively stabbed – “
“You might.”
” – As it is that there’s so many fucking knives, there’s nowhere soft to grab.”

“Flap it like you mean it!”

“He’s filled with information. He’s like a pinata of information.”

“So it’s the flesh of the dead wife?”

“And if it tracks them, will it ultimately stab them? Because that’s not what I want.”

“Oh, I’m about to do something stupid and hilarious.”
“…I’m glad it’s hilarious?”

“I don’t know if the skin has a mind.”

“I’ve got daggers for every occasion here.”

“I told you to throw the budgeoning dagger. It’s called a rock…”

“How dare you attack me with your coccyx?”

“So this has turned into a GoFundMe.”

“I’m pretty sure that’s the god of time.”
“You mean thyme like the spice?”
“Just tell her it’s a bird.”

“He’s going to protect the streets at night now.”
“So you’re saying we have Ratman?”

“You’re gonna hear my heartbeat under the floorboards for the rest of your life.”

“We just didn’t realize how far down we could fall from the floor.”

“Thankfully I’m unconscious.”
“Yeah, but you’re gonna wake up french kissing a rat.”

“I’ll get you a self-bone-tattooing kit.”

“And we activated it. And by we, I mean – “
“‘We.’ Yes.”

“No dice.”
“No, a lotta dice but no hits.”

“All right, the next game I run, poop is going to be a super-important resource.”

“You’ll have two columns, your poop and poop you’ve collected. Because they’ll have different properties.”
“My shit and your shit?”
“Produced and procured?”

“It’s not grave-robbing from this side.”
“Except it is.”
“I see no evidence of a grave here.”

“So we’ll pick up looking into the hole.”

“Now that you’ve said it, I like the idea that infecting him will Emil-iorate the situation.”

“You’re an ‘other people’ to someone.”

“You are way more invested in this hole than the rest of us.”
“It’s my neighbor and I’m nosy!”

“I had fifty feet – “
“Before it was cool?”
“Before it was expensive.”

“I thought my note said ‘there’s a mysterious jackal-twat’…”

“Don’t worry, we’re going to get farther into this and my dice are going to betray me horribly.”
“Or mine.”
“Embrace the healing power of ‘and.'”

“I heard there was this thing called ‘baths.’ I’m looking into it.”

“I’m just trying to stand up for someone that doesn’t stand very tall.”

“You are going the wrong fucking way. In both north-south dimension, east-west dimenstion, and in time.”

“But I didn’t get pickpocketed!”
“The dude made a pocket in you!”

“No, that’s when I’m dead and in the ring that I’ll tell you you need better shoes.”

“…Was it a familiar-looking were-jackal?”

“Tastes like jackal.”
“Tastes different from the outside.”

“Don’t lick the dude’s hair. Just saying, that’s not going to make the impression you think you’re going to make.”

“Does it zap you when you lick it?”
“I’m not going to lick the sword; that’s weird!”

“How much money have I give you guys recently?”
“Yeah, but we’re not putting it on the roof!”

“As me why the codpiece. Because if he tracks us down, I’ll be able to kick him in the dick.”

“Which we have avenged slightly today.”
“I just wish I could have gotten the codpiece off faster.”
“That’s what she said.”

“I got a twelve! Based on a 13! I’m just excited because it’s double digits!”

“I’m not gonna put it there either! We’re not gonna plague the god of spiders!”

“There’s no money in it, but there’s more pussy than Frank Sinatra.”

“It’s a weird way to say half-elf – a human elf.”

“I didn’t expect this character to have a trademark, but apparently I have a trademark.”

“Hey, you wanna stupidly climb into something twice tonight?”

“Wow. I thought we were kind of edgy with what we take from our crimes…”

“Yes, because you had your own personal mission to go kill some werewolves, and now we have more than we started with.”
“Ah, ah, ah. Not true.”
“OK, we have more than we knew we had when we started.”

“Just don’t go by the crematorium.”
“That’s a whole other kind of snowman.”
“That has more man than snow in it.”

“Does my apartment have windows?”
“No, it has MacOS.”
“No, but it’s already dual-partitioned.”

“I can make any attempt to smother me really uncomfortable for her. One word: mommy.”
“Funny, I pay extra for that.”

“You’re gonna steal a picture of their face and stick it in your bathroom, so don’t fucking tell me about identifiable!”